Fic, Captain Becker's Birthday, Becker, 12
Oct. 5th, 2011 05:43 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
fredbassettTitle : Captain Becker’s Birthday
Author : fredbassett
Fandom : Primeval
Rating : 12
Characters : Hilary Becker, Giles Becker
Disclaimer : Not mine, no money made, don’t sue.
Spoilers : None
Summary : Written for![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
tli’s birthday, from the prompt birthday candles. Giles belongs to tli and I absolutely adore him! Happy Birthday, my dear, and thank you for all your wonderful Becker fic, I love it with a fiery vengeance!
Becker closed the door of his flat with a backward kick that would probably earn him yet another letter of complaint from the management company for disturbing the peace of the other residents, but he really didn’t care.
He hated the management company and its representatives almost as much as he hated everything with fur, feathers, scales, claws, teeth and bad breath that tried to eviscerate him on a depressingly regular basis.
He hated them almost as much as he hated the fact that he wasn’t allowed to reduce said creatures to their component parts with the aid of his favourite combat shotgun.
He added tree-hugging scientists to the list of things that he hated with a fiery vengeance as he stalked into his kitchen in search of something to improve his temper. Something that came neatly wrapped in glass and contained alcohol was high on his list of things that would improve his day. Along with the instant and bloody demise of things with fur, feathers, scales, teeth, claws, bad breath, and scientists and…
His brother, Giles.
His brother Giles who was sitting at his kitchen table, eating the last slice of cold pizza that he’d saved for an emergency snack – and yes, today did class as an emergency, thank you very much – and drinking a bottle of the cold beer that Becker had been looking forward to enjoying an indecently close relationship with. In fact, knowing Giles, the bastard had probably already drunk the whole bloody crate. Becker’s eyes slid to the recycling box in the corner of the room, but to his surprise it was still empty. The little sod had probably only just arrived. Either that or he’d inconsiderately dumped the empties into the ordinary bin.
Oh yes, brother Giles was most certainly on the ever-growing list of his pet hates, along with management companies, scientists, things he wasn’t allowed to kill and the traffic warden that had given him a parking ticket instead of the grovelling thanks that he was entitled to after ensuring that the wretched man was still alive to issue the said ticket. Without a shadow of a doubt, Becker’s tally of people – and things – that would be first against the wall come the revolution was getting longer by the minute.
And there was another bloody good reason for his bad temper…
“Happy Birthday, Hilary!”
Yes, that bloody good reason.
“Sod off, Giles.”
“That’s no way to talk to your beloved brother,” Giles chided with one of his usual shit-eating grins.
Becker was utterly convinced that Giles was the living proof that the fairies really did leave their demon-spawn behind in the place of human babies, even though his mother still insisted on claiming full responsibility for the brat she’d lovingly reared instead of drowning at birth.
“I haven’t got a beloved brother,” he pointed out. After all, he was an officer and a gentleman, and gentlemen never lied – apart from on the subject their mother’s cooking in which case a small a certain degree of latitude was allowed if one wished to live to tell the tale.
“Harsh, Hilary, so harsh, but I know you love me really.”
“Delusional as ever, Giles.”
With a flourish that he’d probably learned from the head waiter in the poncy French restaurant down the road – even though the sod hadn’t been any closer to France than the end of Brighton pier – Giles suddenly produced something that looked remarkably like a wax hedgehog from underneath the table and started to set light to each of its multi-coloured spines with a cigarette lighter.
“What the fuck is that?” Becker demanded, as the smell of warm wax started to pervade his kitchen.
“It’s a birthday cake, you ungrateful little runt.” Giles leaned back in his chair. “I’ve even got you a card.”
Becker stared hard at the object on the table and delivered his verdict. “It’s a load of candles stuck in a cupcake.”
Giles slid a bottle of beer across the table and produced two pizza boxes from the chair next to him that had been hidden by his jacket. “Two Buddhist pizzas.”
Becker rolled his eyes. Giles was probably the last person in the world that found ‘make me one with everything’ jokes funny but even he had to admit that the prospect of a beer and a takeaway pizza was starting to take on an attractive hue even when coupled with the presence of his brother.
At least the little bastard hadn’t treated him to anything even remotely resembling a cartoon dinosaur…
“You haven’t opened your card yet,” Giles grinned, handing him an envelope.
A moment later, a purple T-rex with a shit-eating grin as big as Giles’ stared up at him from a card emblazoned with the words NOW WE ARE SIX, with a number two inked in untidily above the word six.
“Would you like me to sing Happy Birthday while you blow out your candles?”
Becker sighed.
If the little swine really did start to sing, Becker wasn’t sure he’d be answerable for his actions. He wondered what the management company’s policy was on the ritual dismemberment of relatives in the communal hallway.
He leaned forward, sucked in a deep breath, and blew out the candles.
As the aroma of warm wax intensified, he had to admit – but only to himself, of course – that he’d had birthdays end in worst ways.
And the Buddhist pizzas did smell awfully good…
Author : fredbassett
Fandom : Primeval
Rating : 12
Characters : Hilary Becker, Giles Becker
Disclaimer : Not mine, no money made, don’t sue.
Spoilers : None
Summary : Written for
tli’s birthday, from the prompt birthday candles. Giles belongs to tli and I absolutely adore him! Happy Birthday, my dear, and thank you for all your wonderful Becker fic, I love it with a fiery vengeance!Becker closed the door of his flat with a backward kick that would probably earn him yet another letter of complaint from the management company for disturbing the peace of the other residents, but he really didn’t care.
He hated the management company and its representatives almost as much as he hated everything with fur, feathers, scales, claws, teeth and bad breath that tried to eviscerate him on a depressingly regular basis.
He hated them almost as much as he hated the fact that he wasn’t allowed to reduce said creatures to their component parts with the aid of his favourite combat shotgun.
He added tree-hugging scientists to the list of things that he hated with a fiery vengeance as he stalked into his kitchen in search of something to improve his temper. Something that came neatly wrapped in glass and contained alcohol was high on his list of things that would improve his day. Along with the instant and bloody demise of things with fur, feathers, scales, teeth, claws, bad breath, and scientists and…
His brother, Giles.
His brother Giles who was sitting at his kitchen table, eating the last slice of cold pizza that he’d saved for an emergency snack – and yes, today did class as an emergency, thank you very much – and drinking a bottle of the cold beer that Becker had been looking forward to enjoying an indecently close relationship with. In fact, knowing Giles, the bastard had probably already drunk the whole bloody crate. Becker’s eyes slid to the recycling box in the corner of the room, but to his surprise it was still empty. The little sod had probably only just arrived. Either that or he’d inconsiderately dumped the empties into the ordinary bin.
Oh yes, brother Giles was most certainly on the ever-growing list of his pet hates, along with management companies, scientists, things he wasn’t allowed to kill and the traffic warden that had given him a parking ticket instead of the grovelling thanks that he was entitled to after ensuring that the wretched man was still alive to issue the said ticket. Without a shadow of a doubt, Becker’s tally of people – and things – that would be first against the wall come the revolution was getting longer by the minute.
And there was another bloody good reason for his bad temper…
“Happy Birthday, Hilary!”
Yes, that bloody good reason.
“Sod off, Giles.”
“That’s no way to talk to your beloved brother,” Giles chided with one of his usual shit-eating grins.
Becker was utterly convinced that Giles was the living proof that the fairies really did leave their demon-spawn behind in the place of human babies, even though his mother still insisted on claiming full responsibility for the brat she’d lovingly reared instead of drowning at birth.
“I haven’t got a beloved brother,” he pointed out. After all, he was an officer and a gentleman, and gentlemen never lied – apart from on the subject their mother’s cooking in which case a small a certain degree of latitude was allowed if one wished to live to tell the tale.
“Harsh, Hilary, so harsh, but I know you love me really.”
“Delusional as ever, Giles.”
With a flourish that he’d probably learned from the head waiter in the poncy French restaurant down the road – even though the sod hadn’t been any closer to France than the end of Brighton pier – Giles suddenly produced something that looked remarkably like a wax hedgehog from underneath the table and started to set light to each of its multi-coloured spines with a cigarette lighter.
“What the fuck is that?” Becker demanded, as the smell of warm wax started to pervade his kitchen.
“It’s a birthday cake, you ungrateful little runt.” Giles leaned back in his chair. “I’ve even got you a card.”
Becker stared hard at the object on the table and delivered his verdict. “It’s a load of candles stuck in a cupcake.”
Giles slid a bottle of beer across the table and produced two pizza boxes from the chair next to him that had been hidden by his jacket. “Two Buddhist pizzas.”
Becker rolled his eyes. Giles was probably the last person in the world that found ‘make me one with everything’ jokes funny but even he had to admit that the prospect of a beer and a takeaway pizza was starting to take on an attractive hue even when coupled with the presence of his brother.
At least the little bastard hadn’t treated him to anything even remotely resembling a cartoon dinosaur…
“You haven’t opened your card yet,” Giles grinned, handing him an envelope.
A moment later, a purple T-rex with a shit-eating grin as big as Giles’ stared up at him from a card emblazoned with the words NOW WE ARE SIX, with a number two inked in untidily above the word six.
“Would you like me to sing Happy Birthday while you blow out your candles?”
Becker sighed.
If the little swine really did start to sing, Becker wasn’t sure he’d be answerable for his actions. He wondered what the management company’s policy was on the ritual dismemberment of relatives in the communal hallway.
He leaned forward, sucked in a deep breath, and blew out the candles.
As the aroma of warm wax intensified, he had to admit – but only to himself, of course – that he’d had birthdays end in worst ways.
And the Buddhist pizzas did smell awfully good…
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2011-10-06 09:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-07 07:34 am (UTC)It was a pleasure to be able to borrow Giles for this!
no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 04:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 05:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 05:25 pm (UTC)(And now I want pizza dang it)
no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 05:29 pm (UTC)I loved this! Also loved the little HHGTG ref! Great stuff.
no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 05:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:42 pm (UTC)(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 06:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 06:26 pm (UTC)A moment later, a purple T-rex with a shit-eating grin as big as Giles’ stared up at him from a card emblazoned with the words NOW WE ARE SIX, with a number two inked in untidily above the word six.
*snort* He means well :D
Lovely! Happy Birthday
no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 06:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:46 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 07:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 08:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 08:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 08:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-06 11:45 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 09:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-06 11:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 10:41 pm (UTC)Great way to start the day here
no subject
Date: 2011-10-06 11:50 am (UTC)(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2011-10-06 02:54 am (UTC)this is a great fic - poor Becker, used and abused for our amusement.
but most importantly: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TLI!
no subject
Date: 2011-10-06 11:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-06 03:15 am (UTC)Great fiction:)
no subject
Date: 2011-10-06 11:59 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-06 06:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-06 08:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-06 10:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-07 07:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-07 07:47 am (UTC)LOL - I love Becker and his deeply thinky inner thoughts, and how he got to have his birthday celebrated in a proper manner *G*
no subject
Date: 2011-10-07 07:54 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-08 08:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-09 06:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-09 12:06 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2011-10-09 01:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-09 01:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-10-08 07:44 pm (UTC)(I have a feeling I was holiday when you posted this last year, which possibly explains how I missed it...)
no subject
Date: 2012-10-08 08:41 pm (UTC)